Chapter 17: A happy reuniting, and because they don’t notice something, that makes it happy?

Everyone is in a good mood.

My name is Scarlet Ruby Noel Lingard and I am a villainous queen who was killed 108 times…and the main character of this story.

You know the rest.

I’m enjoying this 109th life.

In the flush of youth, a squishy little baby.

Can’t speak, can’t walk, can’t stand.

Like the proverbial floundering fish on a shore.

I have no official name yet.

Just a nameless infant.

The reason is, I have yet to be baptized.

So here is a synopsis of what’s happened.

I tried to smile at Mary, and my face looked cramped.

Then Bradd laughed at my face.

It pissed me off, so I tried my hardest to return my face to normal, and by doing so I ended up having a pissed off little look on my face.

I frowned, looking straight ahead, making all the muscles in my face stiff.

My eyebrows wrinkled…

What the HELL am I DOING?!

Heh heh, oh well…whatever. Life is but a dream, after all.

All things pass, prosperity and decline, just maintain a serene state of mind, and be ready for every change.

Even though I look like this now, I’ve been killed 108 times before.

Every little problem is nothing compared to that.

Piece of cake, really. All things come to those who wait. Everything will be okay soon.

The wind carries news of both good and bad.

And life isn’t all about hardships.

・・・・・・・・・・・

OH WHAT THE HELL! I CAN’T FOOL MYSELF!

I’m not seeing the big picture. I’m too into enduring suffering.

Even with all those 108 deaths, I’m STILL A YOUNG LADY!

Why’d I gotta act so hardcore, like some gangster, where I gotta do what I gotta do!

In any case, I’m the main character here, doing all the work for you!

Someone please come and help me!

Where is my dashing prince on a white horse, who wafts his cape in the air like a hero, COME ON AND PICK ME UP?!

「…it’s pretty clear this baby is completely conscious, totally. The same as an adult. She knows what I’m saying and what’s going on.」

GYAAAAA! BRADDDDDD! Not this again!

You’re not my prince, but some kid in a maid outfit with a skirt!

「I can sense it by her blood flow.」

Damn it, that line again!

Is saying crap like that even credible?!

You can’t just explain everything off by saying “It’s blood flow!”
Maybe we all noticed that your line is a massive joke? That’s some theory that you suddenly pull out of your ass, hoping we don’t figure it out, and then go back to acting as if it’s a natural statement to make!

See? NOW we’re getting to the “heart” of the matter!

Damn it all…the previous 108 times, you were a silent hitman!

But now that you’re a boy, you skip around with that flittering skirt and ribbons, suddenly taking a new employment where all you do is talk! And all the while, I’M there heroine of the story…but in a baby’s body.

It really pisses me off.

But I can’t rage about it in this baby body.

Since I can’t do anything about it, I tried something different, imagining what the adult Bradd would look like in that ridiculous maid outfit…the same size as the one he’s wearing now.

And not forgetting the ribbon…!

Fyeeeew!

With a skirt that tight, I can see all the way up your thighs!

You can make that fearless, dark expression again…and say,

「…if you don’t want to die, then move.」

Such a bitter voice, just like a famed Shakespearean line, and I can play it over and over in my mind!

Now let’s imagine you beautifully curtsying!

All of your enemies would be googly-eyed at seeing you like that.

How’s that?! If it pisses you off, you can say you read the flow of my blood again.

And even if you do, IT HAS NO EFFECT ON ME!

HAH HAH HAH HAH!

Finally satisfied with my own weird imagination, I found myself baby-laughing.

Take that! The happy laugh of an evil queen!

OH HO HO HO HO HO!

Hwaaah!?

Why does this voice make me shudder so?

Since I was so intent on not smiling, the laugh came out like a frog’s croak!

I’m not an evil queen, but a demon queen!

「…the baby’s conscious? Do you understand me, baby?」

Mary said, looking at me.

Damn. That idiot Bradd is no one to mess around with.

At this rate, with this rat-fink Bradd, instead of me being able to banish him from my little cradle, I could end up being exiled MYSELF!

A newborn baby that understands speech is one crazy explosion of strangeness!

I could even be treated like a witch!

Look sweet, then! Come on, act like a sweet baby!

It’s my only weapon now, the smile of an angel baby…my only way to survive!

Smiiiiile.

「She somehow looks angry…」

Mary says, sadly.

No! My face is just stiff from all the faces I’ve been making!

Don’t misunderstand!

I’m not angry! I love you, MARYYYY!

I rubbed my cheeks with my little hands to loosen them up.

They won’t go back to normal!

At least let me laugh!

「Geh heh geh geh geh…」

Gyaaaa! That’s scary!

Almost like the strange laugh of some weird beast!

I’m going to end up looking like a possessed witch!

「…what is she doing?」

Bradd looked a bit shocked, an put his finger to my neck.

「Hup.」

I felt something pop, and something seemed to lighten.

My body warmed up.

I felt power return to me, almost like after taking a hot bath.

The tension on my cheeks loosened.

Whoaaa! It moves! My face can move again!

「Whewwwww」

After locking up my face like I did, it all loosened again, so I breathed a sigh of relief.

Thanks, Bradd. Sorry…Bradd.

As an apology to you, from now on when I imagine your adult self in that outfit, I’ll make the skirt knee length.

I winked at Bradd to show my gratitude, as the tough as nails baby was now a soft as feathers baby, giggling and cooing again.

「There’s no baby that does stuff like this.」

Bradd said, and mother and Mary looking at me, nodded to him.

WHAT?!

Dong Dong Dong Dong!

The sound of gongs? A hallucination?!

Ambushing soldiers?! Here?!

You bastard, Bradd!

Catching me in a double trap!

But that’s Bradd for you.

A just man that hides his secret weapon under his maid skirt.

To set a trap like this and never letting me know…

I’ll never let my guard down again though.

In my previous 108 lives, I was always the queen.

I was always so shrewd and cunning in my battle for succession that I always won.

There’s no way I’m letting you catch me like that again.

「And not only that, this dummy is easily letting herself get caught!」

GRRRRR! Don’t call me an dummy, you IDIOT!

「…it surprised me. This little baby is actually conscious…」

Mary said as she looked at me, the final word of her statement leaving her mouth with a quiver.

I guess I can’t hide it.

I had no choice but to nod.

「…Really…I see.」

Mary then fell silent, and I could feel her hands, holding me, begin to shake.

I guess that’s better than her tossing me away in fear though.

I guess I understand though, it is weird for a baby.

So I stopped trying to reach out to her and withdrew my outstretched hands.

「Ahh ohhh ohhh」

I’m sorry, I was fooling you all until now.

Even so, I was very happy.

Mary loved me like her true child.

I also felt like I was her child as well.

I thought it would be great to replace her son as her true child.

But in my previous 108 lives, my mother died as soon as I was born.

That’s why it’s the first time that I was spoiled with having a real mother that lived with me.

And my mother now respects and cared for me.

But the memories of Mary as my “mother” remain.

So even if you’re afraid of me, I will still carry the memory of you with me.

The treasure that I have, now during my 109th life.

Goodbye, my other mother…

Ughhhh….

「…hey, don’t cry. Don’t jump to conclusions, munchkin.」

There were tears on my forehead from crying in Mary’s arms, which Bradd flicked off with a thwick.

W…what the hell! An infant’s skull is still forming!

「It’s wonderful! …my prayers to God were answered!」

Mary shouted happily, squeezing me tightly and rubbing her cheeks into mine.

What? What does that mean!?

Brad laughed at me, while my eyes were wide open from confusion,

「You really are an idiot.」

What the hell?!