The Law of Webnovels - Chapter 281
Chapter 281: Chapter 281
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We squabbled for a while, then I called him, “Um, Eun Jiho.”
“Huh?”
Flaunting a grin, I continued, “If the reason why you can’t stay with me is that you’re afraid that I might disappear, I won’t be able to do anything to you.”
“…”
Eun Jiho’s eyes widened then subsided. While he directed them on me, I kept on speaking at a slow pace.
“Neither I nor you can do anything about me disappearing.”
“Yeah, true…”
“But if you still don’t mind me vanishing away…” Breathing out for a second, I uttered, “I’d like to stay next to you right now because today only comes once.”
“…”
“… That’s what Chun Young said to me.”
Holding the swing, Eun Jiho reeled after my remark. He then lifted his head to look at me. Blinking swiftly as if he felt dumbfounded, Eun Jiho soon asked back in an unusually loud voice.
“Really? Hey, don’t lie to me. Yoo Chun Young isn’t a good enough speaker to say those things.”
“I told you he has changed.”
“Did he get possessed for a second?”
I burst into laughter. ‘How could these two react so similarly?’ Having that thought in mind, I spoke loudly with a giggle.
“Dude, Ban Yeo Ryung also said the same as you. She was like, ‘That tongue doesn’t belong to the Yoo Chun Young I know,’ so Chun Young looked heartbroken when he heard her.”
“Ban Yeo Ryung… she’s indeed a woman who spits words that pierce like swords…”
Agreeing enthusiastically with his response, I giggled out loud again.
We then laughed so hard until our stomach hurt. Feeling the pain spreading in our bellies, we both leaned on the swing ropes. I opened my mouth again.
“But what Chun Young said to me was exactly what I wanted to tell you. I wish I had a better memory.”
“What?”
I turned my head and smiled at him.
I continued, “Anyway, it’s good to prepare for the future, but don’t miss the time right now. Sometimes, be true to yourself and your feelings too.”
“… It feels different to hear that from you.”
“Oh, I’m really sorry about the things I’ve done before entering high school.”
A moment of silence returned between us.
Eun Jiho then asked me, ‘Should we go now?’ which made me take the boxes in my arms and get up from the swing. The playground where we chilled just now was right in front of my apartment, but Eun Jiho kept on insisting that he would see me get back home, so he followed me, stepping into the entrance.
Waiting for the elevator to arrive, I found him standing there, remaining wordless for quite a while, so I flung a question.
“What’s on your mind?”
“Oh, just…”
Rubbing his chin, he continued, “I was thinking about the moments that might have changed if I behaved true to myself.”
“Hmm…”
“The moments when I ran away…”
His last voice sounded unusually low and heavy. Eun Jiho then suddenly changed the look on his face and replied with a slight shrug.
“Pondering about myself, yeah… maybe I’m a coward even more than you, Ham Donnie.”
“Come to think of it, didn’t you do that over here?”
Glancing around, I continued, “You said something like I’ll give you ten seconds to cry… something like that.”
“Oh…”
“I became so speechless that my tears went back into my eyes.”
“Geez, how come you always bring up something like that?”
While he grumbled, the elevator door opened with a clang. We then stepped inside and pressed the floor button familiarly.
“But I was also thinking about that thing too,” he said.
“What?”
“You…”
Eun Jiho’s gentle and low voice suddenly pierced through the quiet elevator, which made me turn my head to look at him.
Under the lighting, Eun Jiho’s eyes were darkly shaded. He then uttered in a throaty voice.
“You always make me think about those things I should not.”
Flinching my hand for a second, I replied, “What happens when you think about them?”
“I would long for it.”
“Then, if you long for it, what happens next?”
Eun Jiho didn’t smile. He just dropped his gaze at the floor then diverted his eyes back onto me.
He then replied, “I’m wondering about the same thing.”
Putting the bottle of Macallan or Macmillan… whatever it is, on the table, I placed the bracelet gift box for my mom next to it and came back to my room. As soon as I went inside, I opened the box of chocolate and took out a piece to enjoy, then began to search for my career survey sheet.
After a while, I finally found the crumpled paper and spread it out on my desk to flatten it. Next, I took out my pencil to write a few things down but soon paused.
‘Hmm… if I suddenly declare that I want to build my career in fine arts, my parents will blame me for blurting out such things since it was something that they have never even seen and heard of from me until then. I should first talk to them about it before dropping it out.’
Rambling those thoughts, I soon came up with something that I forgot until now.
I opened my drawer and took out a phone that wasn’t mine, then I checked if I received any messages or calls. When I found that there was nothing on the phone, I put it back into the drawer. ‘Maybe I’ll meet her at school tomorrow,’ even though I thought that way, I couldn’t help but feel uneasy about something that was weighing down a corner of my heart.
After all, I did not receive a single message from Ruda throughout the rest of the summer break.
Wondering if there was any way for me to reach out to her using the phone, I, eventually, grunted and collapsed on the bed again.
I then lost myself in my thoughts while looking up at the ceiling.
We all have our own door.
We can only go beyond the door by using each other’s hands. That way, we get to know the things we didn’t notice until now and learn the truth that laid within our hearts. From this aspect, we realize new pain, new happiness, and new hope. No matter what the consequences are, we could never go back to the time before we opened the door.
I also had my door.
All the shrapnel of my feelings that I had been pressing down on for years would be there. All my sincerity, which I was afraid to face, would be there.
Clenching my fist, I promised myself, ‘I’ve finally decided to cross the door right now.’
I had never crossed the door upon my fear of change; however, if I could keep all my experiences into something like a journal or a picture, which were the records that hardly faded away…
Even if the world changed again and everything around me vanished, which I was always afraid of… or even if the world didn’t change, but everyone around me disappeared through the wave of destiny, parts of them could still stay beside me through my records.
Thus, I decided to pursue my dream of recording or archiving my present. The day when my dream really came true, I would no longer regard this place as a world inside a web novel.
I would leave the past behind me eventually and cross the door in search of what I really wanted.
Through my own will…
* * *
We all have our own door.
What he didn’t get until now existed over there.
Those who had lived through emotions alone learned cognitive thinking beyond that door, whereas those who have lived only rationally learn to give themselves to feel. On the other hand, they took comfort from understanding themselves as something that was not as bad as they had thought.
Some might also find warm enlightenment that they were no longer alone or get to know how to overcome past wounds and make new friends without fear.
Beyond Yi Ruda’s door, there was freedom.
Yi Ruda thought about the things beyond the tightly closed iron door.
Freedom.
That was what he achieved over the last few years by getting away from Yi Jenny’s control.
Yi Ruda raised his hand and grasped his hair. It wasn’t so painful to be locked up when he didn’t know what freedom was. He sighed while being surrounded by the impregnable surveillance and fortress-like walls.
Since Yi Ruda was here, Ian would have also returned. Maybe Yi Jenny might have not allowed Ian full access to the building since it was easy to just say that some security issues occurred or some half-assed excuses like that.
Yi Ruda then bit his lips. If even Ian didn’t have full access to this building, no one would make it through this place where Yi Ruda was right now. In other words, Yi Ruda would never be able to leave this place anymore unless he had fulfilled Yi Jenny’s requirements; it was clear that what she demanded from him would definitely be the successor training, which Yi Ruda had been asked for years.