Midnight Bookstore - Chapter 474
Chapter 474: Salted Fish is an Attitude
What kind of experience is it to sit face to face with me? It’s not peaceful and quiet nor is it a silent look. It’s not a thousand words at a glance.
Zhou Ze found that the more he looked at this version of himself in front of him, the more unhappy he became! He wanted to slap him. He wanted to beat him. He wanted to kill him!
Zhou Ze shuddered. Was he crazy? Why did he have this kind of thought?
When he stabbed himself to death with the surgical forceps in his previous life, that version of himself in the white lab coat was helping him to be free.
When he killed Xu Le and used the whip to whip the mountain-moving monkey, it was purely to vent his anger in his dream and indulge himself.
Then, why did he have the urge to kill this person in front of him now?
Moreover, this impulse did not occur to him. The moment he thought about it, his thoughts became heavier and heavier. It was as if there were countless voices in his heart encouraging and bewitching him.
Kill him. Kill this person in front of him. As long as you kill him, you will be free! Anyway, it’s a dream. kill him. It’s just a dream! Kill him. Give it a try.
The chaotic thoughts were about to burst Zhou Ze’s mind. Zhou Ze grabbed his head with both hands and lowered it. His forehead kept hitting the coffee table in front of him.
“Bang! Bang! Bang!”
“What’s wrong with you?”
He put down the newspaper in front of him and asked curiously. At the same time, he looked at the Old Priest with some blame. Why did he let a mental patient in?
“I’m fine.”
Zhou Ze raised his head and subconsciously reached out to take the coffee in front of him.
“Pa!”
Zhou Ze’s hand and his hand grabbed each other. There was no ambiguity. There were no other thoughts. There was no bullshit purple halo.
Zhou Ze knew very well it was he who was unwilling to let him drink his coffee! He knew him too well!
“Hehe.”
Zhou Ze let go of his hand. He hurriedly picked up his coffee and drank it in one gulp. He was not afraid of the heat.
“…” Zhou Ze.
He deserved a beating. Why didn’t he realize that he deserved a beating before?
Huh, when the dream is over, I’ll find an opportunity to beat Lawyer An up. This fellow has probably held a grudge against me for a very long time.
“What do you want to do?” He asked from the other side.
“I don’t want to do anything.”
Zhou Ze patted the coffee table. There was a “Clang” sound.
He looked down. Why was he suddenly holding a dagger in his hand?
Clang.
Zhou Ze threw the dagger away. He said, “I’m sorry, it’s a misunderstanding.”
“A misunderstanding?” He looked to his right.
Zhou Ze also looked to his right.
He noticed that there was a machete on his right leg. It was a very exaggerated machete. It had a decorative ring on it. The workmanship was quite exquisite.
“Clang!”
Zhou Ze kicked the machete away,
“This is also a misunderstanding.”
The machete fell to the ground and cracked a tile.
On the other side, he looked at the crack and frowned slightly.
“I spent money for the tile.”
“Oh.” On the other side, he nodded. “Do you want to kill me?”
“…” Zhou Ze.
I didn’t realize it before. I’m as smart as expected of myself.
“Go ahead and kill me. Hurry up.” He picked up the newspaper, motioning for Zhou Ze to hurry up.
‘Was he so eager to die?’ Zhou Ze stood up. He was restraining the impulse in his heart. This inexplicable impulse to try and kill him. He said, “I don’t want to kill you.”
Zhou Ze shrugged to show his sincerity. Then he found that he was holding a rope with a circle knot in it.
“…” Zhou Ze.
“I won’t resist,” he said, “because I know what I am.”
Zhou Ze put the rope on the coffee table. This was his dream. That was why it was so bizarre. That was why it was so absurd. This was a dream!
He opened his eyes but his eyes were instantly bloodshot. He couldn’t control himself anymore.
Why? Why was the urge to kill him getting stronger and stronger?
He put down the newspaper. He stood up. He left the sofa. When he reached the door, “Want to go for a walk? I’ll give you time to think about killing me.”
Zhou Ze also got up and went out with him.
His dream self walked in front of him. Zhou Ze followed behind. The two people were only five steps apart. Whenever Zhou Ze wants he could have killed him from behind at any time.
There was always a lot of traffic in the prime area of South Street, even in his dreams. The two of them, one at the front and one at the back, walked through the crowd.
There was no communication. There wasn’t even eye contact. This made Zhou Ze a little angry. Was he so lazy in front that he didn’t even have the will to defend himself? He didn’t even bother to struggle?
So lazy. So Buddhist. Then you’d better go to Hell!
His brain heated up. The fingernails on Zhou Ze’s right hand grew out and he directly rushed to a very close distance behind the Zhou Ze in front of him. However, just as he was about to insert his fingernails, the Zhou Ze in front of him stopped in his tracks.
Zhou Ze’s body staggered and he shook his head violently. He once again resisted the urge to kill the Zhou Ze in front of him with great difficulty.
In front of him, he seemed to be waiting. It was as if he was silently asking Zhou Ze, “why didn’t you make a move?”
“Hehe.” In front of him, he laughed. It was as if he was mocking.
Adding fuel to the fire. He was eager to die.
Zhou Ze’s left hand grabbed the wrist of his right hand. This fingernail just couldn’t be pierced!
In front of him, he waited for a long time. He seemed to be tired from waiting, so he simply sat down on the curb.
Facing the stream of people. The warmth of spring bloomed.
Zhou Ze had never thought that he would have such a leisurely side to him.
Not afraid of death? Was that still him?
In front of him, he sat down like this. Behind him was a telephone pole. He just happened to be leaning against it. There were several fresh advertisements under his feet.
“Hey, there’s money here.”
In front of him, he pointed to a corner under the telephone pole with some surprise. It was a hundred-dollar bill.
He leaned over and picked it up. When he flipped it open, it was a photo of a young model. There was also a contact number that provided a door-to-door service.
On the back, there was a picture of a hundred-dollar bill. It was very realistic.
“Hehe.”
In front of him, he threw out this small card that was realistic and creative. Let it wait for the next fated person.
“Aren’t you afraid that I’ll kill you?” Zhou Ze asked.
He didn’t know why, although it was a dream, Zhou Ze had a strange sense of reality. It was as if this slash of his might lose something forever.
The previous Zhou Ze didn’t answer. He just sat quietly and smiled silently.
This kind of feeling made Zhou Ze feel a little unfamiliar. This wasn’t like him. He thought that if he were to switch positions, he wouldn’t sit there so calmly.
Fight. He had to fight no matter who the other party was, he would fight for his life!
He did not want to die but he also wanted to live a life of inactivity. It seemed that the two were very contradictory but in fact, they were not at all contradictory.
If he were to ask himself, at least half of the people in this world lived like this. They wanted to succeed, but they were unwilling to work hard. They liked to be at ease, but they used this as an excuse to refuse to work hard.
He would suddenly wake up in the middle of the night. He felt that he should not muddle through life like this. He should work hard, strive, and surpass. When he woke up the next day everything was the same. It was as if the self-condemnation from last night was just an act to comfort himself.
“I’m afraid.” The self in front replied.
“I’m not afraid.”
“Why?” Zhou Ze asked.
“Do you want to know the answer?” His previous self asked.
Zhou Ze nodded.
His previous self stretched out his palm, and a long nail grew on his index finger. Then, he stabbed his nail into his chest.
“PFFT!”
Zhou Ze felt a stabbing pain. He lowered his head to take a look but he found that his nail was inserted into his chest.
It was probably due to the experience of an excellent surgeon. He knew how to stab someone. It seemed exaggerated, but it would not be fatal.
“Why?” Zhou Ze looked at the wound on his chest and asked. At the same time, he slowly pulled out his fingernails.
“The answer is right in front of our eyes.”
Zhou Ze raised his head in confusion. There was still a surging crowd in front of him.
Where was the answer?
Suddenly, Zhou Ze found himself sitting on the curb. His other self was standing where he was before, talking.
“This…”
His other self sat down beside Zhou Ze.
“This is the answer.”
“The answer…”
“Yes, I’m afraid of death.”
He answered very honestly because Zhou Ze himself was also afraid of death.
“‘m afraid of death, so I can’t commit suicide at any time.”
“Suicide…”
“Right, why would I kill myself?”
His other self looked at Zhou Ze. Zhou Ze was also looking at his other-self. The two of them let out a long sigh of relief together.
Then, they faced the street together. They looked at the endless stream of people in front of them.
“Even if the whole world abandons me, at least I can decide whether I want to be happy or sad.”
The other person sighed. “This is the life that I want. I’m already tired, so I want to be lazy and do nothing. I want to live with dignity, but I don’t want to die, so I can only be lazy and eat. The comfort that I couldn’t get in my previous life. I want to cherish it in this life. Even if it ended in a day, there’s nothing to regret.”
“A life like a salted fish?” Zhou Ze smiled.
“Yeah, what’s wrong with being a salted fish? Countless people envy and want this kind of life, but they can’t get it.”
…
A man in a black hoodie stood behind a stall at the back of the road with a cell phone pasted on the membrane. He clenched his fists, full of disbelief.
Why didn’t he kill him? Not only did he not kill him but the two of them were squatting on the curb together. They were smoking while shaking their legs. They looked like two lazy people who had eaten relief food in the mountain village and didn’t want to work but were sitting on the dam and taking a nap in the sun.
What in the world?! Why?!
