I Pick Up A Bunch Of Attributes Novel - Chapter 343
343 Embarrassing
“Oh?”
Feng Xia showed a faint smile. “Is that a big move to thank me?”
Patriarch Muchen froze in midair.
His mind was about to go crazy.
!!
Why!
Why exactly?!
Why did Xia Donghai succeed every time, as if his body belonged to the other party? When it was him himself, he would fail again and again!
At this time, he could not tell Feng Xia the truth…
That I feel that I am invincible, and you look like you are quite easy to bully, so I plan to teach you a lesson so that I can take revenge for you kicking me so many times earlier?
If he really said that, this vicious demon would probably kick him again in the next second and break the skin of the drum, directly killing him!
As this was someone who even dared to attack the Holy Son, Patriarch Muchen did not doubt this person’s capability at all.
“Of course I… Of course I want…”
After stammering for a long time, Patriarch Muchen suddenly had an idea. He squeezed out an ugly smile and said carefully, “It’s like this. I see that Senior’s achievements are peerless and you intimidate everyone in this wasteland. With a raise of your hand, the light of the Great Dao blooms, interpreting the absolute truth of the Great Dao…”
Feng Xia raised his eyebrows. “Speak using human language.”
He thought for a moment and immediately corrected himself. “Cut the crap.”
“I… I understand!”
Patriarch Muchen shivered again. “I just think you might be a little bored, so I want to dance to liven things up for you… Look, this is a dance I learned on the battlefield when I was young…”
At this point, he twisted his body without thinking and performed ugly dance moves one after another. Feng Xia gnashed his teeth as he watched. He almost wanted to give this guy a good beating.
“Is this guy possessed by the strangeness of the wasteland?”
If a young girl with a graceful figure like Zhu Youniang were to dance, Feng Xia naturally would not mind at all.
Even if it was a little girl like Qing Lin, it might have a different flavor.
However, Patriarch Muchen was such a plump old man… if it was put across in a pleasant way. To put it in a more unpleasant way, when such a fatty flirted with you with his hands on his waist…
It made Feng Xia want to kill Patriarch Muchen and then go off to wash his eyes.
However, as Feng Xia’s expression darkened, Patriarch Muchen’s heart sank to the bottom. He did not know how many times this had happened already, but he gritted his teeth and danced even harder.
He even unbuttoned his shirt and started to slap his body.
“What the hell…” Feng Xia could not help but cover his eyes. “Where was this guy born back then? Which damn battlefield was it? There were even people who performed belly dancing on the battlefield?”
However, in the next moment, Feng Xia’s expression suddenly changed.
Thump!
Thump!
Thud!
The heavy and majestic drumbeats were like dense raindrops or loud thunder. As the louds drumbeats sounded, it felt as if it could make one’s blood surge and become hot-blooded, making one’s combat strength rise to an unprecedented limit!
Immediately after, the blood clouds that could devour everything erupted again.
It was earth-shattering and shocking!
Even the many corpse monsters in the distance that had yet to approach seemed attracted by an invisible force and fell towards Patriarch Muchen. They were killed by the blood clouds and the remaining pure energy in their bodies was extracted and slowly entered Patriarch Muchen’s body.
Slowly, Patriarch Muchen’s pale face seemed to have gained some color.
Feng Xia instinctively widened his eyes as a question mark slowly appeared above his head.
Could it be that this damned belly dance… was the correct posture to use Patriarch Muchen?
“Wait, this belly dance might not be the right way to activate him. After all, Patriarch Muchen only had memories after he was born. Perhaps in the beginning, this kind of war drum needed a corresponding war dance. However, Patriarch Muchen could only rely on his instincts to recall a portion of the war dance intermittently. In the end, he performed this ghastly dance…”
Feng Xia instantly tried to deduce the truth.
He even had the thought of playing a prank. If he was still on Earth, he might be able to take a video of Patriarch Muchen’s current performance and titled it “Do you like such a young sister”. Then, he would upload it to TikTok and Bilibili…
He would definitely be able to get a lot of clicks.
And… there would be even more replies.
Perhaps most of them would be criticism.
“However, although it looks a little gross, for this fellow to be able to comprehend such a battle dance, it can be considered his opportunity…”
As Feng Xia watched Patriarch Muchen’s “great skills”, he shook his head in the end.
In a sense, this was indeed a good thing.
After all, after he tricked Patriarch Muchen into becoming his ally, he could not perform an act of beating up the old man in front of everyone every time he used the war drum, right?
That would be too embarrassing.
If Patriarch Muchen did things on his own, then Feng Xia could shirk responsibility and claim that he did not know this guy whenever there were witnesses.
Anyway, he would not be the one who was embarrassed.
That was right, sometimes pushing the blame to someone else was just so simple and boring.
“Not bad.”
Finally, when Patriarch Muchen stopped, Feng Xia commented indifferently. The former immediately revealed a pleasantly surprised expression. “Senior, it’s good that you like it… It’s good that you like it…”
Feng Xia patted his chest and silently swallowed a mouthful of blood that was coming out.
Yes, in terms of lethality, it was indeed quite “likable”.
“Let’s go. We’ve wasted enough time. We have to think of a way to leave this place as soon as possible.” Feng Xia glanced at him again before continuing, “Of course, before that, we have to find my two companions.”
“Senior…”
He still wanted to look for someone?!
They should be leaving now!
Patriarch Muchen jumped up on the spot and almost slapped his belly. However, the words were already on the tip of his tongue. In the end, he took a deep breath and said resentfully, “Senior, just tell me what you want me to do. I will definitely do it, come hell or high water!”
“…Why don’t you turn into one of the girls of Futari wa Pretty Cure?”
“…” Before Patriarch Muchen could reply, Feng Xia shook his head forcefully. “Forget it. Just thinking about it makes me want to spit out the New Year’s Eve dinner from the year before the last.”
Patriarch Muchen lowered his head, not daring to say a word.
Fortunately, at this moment, a voice suddenly sounded in Feng Xia’s mind.
“Xia, Xia! Sister Qing Lin and I found somewhere fun!”
…
