Chapter 2: Tell Your Tragic Story and Entertain Everyone

Translator: Atlas Studios Editor: Atlas Studios

As a modern person who was fully immersed in online culture, Feng Xia felt that there was no better phrase to describe his current mood than “bloody hell”.

If there was one…

Then it must be “what the heck bloody hell”.

And if the real world was a game, and there was a plan behind the game, then this planner must be the worst.

Just a few seconds ago, Feng Xia had felt that he had a great advantage.

After absorbing a pile of emerald green light balls, his physique was greatly strengthened. He felt that he was in his best ever condition and could even knock down two of his past selves with a single punch. He was about to eliminate the remaining black spiders so as to satisfy the obsessive-compulsive disorder of a hardcore gamer…

In the end, the black spiders that had fled not long ago returned with at least 10 times the original number as reinforcements.

What kind of upside down plot development was this!?

As Feng Xia faced the overwhelming cluster of black spiders, he watched a tree that was more than 10 meters tall being gnawed and fell by the black spiders in the short timespan it took him to take a breath. He did not dare to stay any longer and chose to obey his heart’s will without any doubt—

To run!!

“If I can’t beat them, I should be able to outrun them?!”

Hello, yes.

Countless black spiders came together, crawling much faster than a single one. From a distance, it looked like a huge monster. With a silent roar, the cluster approached Feng Xia speedily.

Feng Xia’s scalp went numb with just a glance.

Even if he only used his dandruff to think, he knew that this quantity… this volume… would kill him!!

“No, I have to think of something!”

“What are spiders afraid of?”

“Spiders are afraid of mosquitoes… Ah no! Mosquitoes are afraid of spiders!”

Just as Feng Xia was anxiously thinking of a solution, the dark cluster of spiders had already quietly approached him from behind, growing nearer to him. He could hear the spine-tingling biting sound. Before he could even turn around, the huge shadow had already enveloped him and bit down fiercely!

“My life ends now… eh?”

Feng Xia instinctively closed his eyes.

However, a few seconds later, he opened his eyes again with a strange expression.

He did not feel the pain that he had expected. There was only the tiny sound of gnawing and the feeling of getting a faint electric shock, vaguely reminding Feng Xia that… he was currently being bitten by a large cluster of black spiders!

“Could it be… because of those Essence light balls?”

Feng Xia instantly came up with a possible conjecture:

Apart from those, these black spiders were most likely poisonous. However, because he had absorbed those “Poison” light balls, he was now resistant to poison.

“Basically, whatever you hit will drop something, and whatever you eat will nourish you?”

The moment he made his judgment, the image of the black spiders suddenly changed drastically in Feng Xia’s eyes.

No matter their thorny furry limbs, or their abdomens that looked as pale as bones, or the rustling sounds they made, they all looked exceptionally cute at this moment.

Horrible savages (×)

Gleaming attributes (√)

For gamers who were known as the “Fourth Calamity”, their philosophy was that as long as you could not kill me, you could only be slowly beaten to death by me… If the first time did not work, then I would do it a second time. If the second time did not work, then I would do it four times. If four times still did not work, then I would copy someone else’s methods. If that still did not work, then there was still the game master…

Thinking of this, Feng Xia took a deep breath and chose to attack.

Pop!

Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop!

In an instant, the huge black spiders exploded like pitch-black fireworks one by one.

At the same time, bright light balls appeared one after another like pearls falling onto a jade plate. They slowly spread out around Feng Xia’s feet, making this scene far more dazzling than the act of killing cockroaches.

As Feng Xia looked at these scattered attribute light balls, he did not take the initiative to pick them up. Instead, he continued to move forward and took advantage of this great opportunity to use both his hands and feet to try to kill more black spiders!

Even so, he still managed to touch a few attribute light balls and they turned into streams of light and flowed into his body.

Splat! Splat!

Crack! Bam! Biubiubiu!

For a moment, the battle was unusually intense… Well, just treat it as being very intense.

A moment later.

As Feng Xia stopped and panted, he suddenly raised his hand and smacked two attacking black spiders into spider paste. He looked around fiercely and sneered as he said, “Come at me again! Why aren’t you continuing?”

The black spiders made a rustling sound. After a short moment of silence, they suddenly scattered, retreating in all directions like a wave of mercury.

Feng Xia stood there quietly, his gaze cold and murderous.

He waited until all the black spiders had retreated and the surrounding forest was dead silent again before he let out a long cloudy breath. “Oh shoot, I sprained my waist!”

It turned out that for an otaku who lacked exercise all year round, even if he received a surge of powerful energy, he would very likely sprain his waist if he ever tried to return to the fray…

And he had sprained it quite badly too.

You asked whether Feng Xia regretted throwing that punch?

He regretted it. Of course he regretted it. He regretted it quite considerably.

Yet, would it help to regret it?

“Tsk, it’s even more tragic than I expected. Dozens of biting black spiders will more or less cause damage. Moreover, some of them are especially big. Not only can they injure me with their bites, but their toxicity is probably much stronger…”

More importantly, there were simply too many black spiders!

It was simply endless. He had already lost count of how many he had killed, but there were still black spiders surging around him, as if the number would never decrease.

If not for the fact that there was a limit on the number of them who could attack him at the same time, if every spider managed to bite him, he suspected that he would have been bitten to death sooner…

Feng Xia could not help but drop his jaw slightly at the memory of this terrifying battle. It was only now that he finally felt a trace of fear.

Impulse was indeed the devil.

However, was there anyway that he could outrun the black spiders?

I slipped away, then they caught up with me. What was there to say?

Fortunately, the “Essence” light balls that dropped on the ground not only strengthened his physique, but also helped to heal his stamina and injuries.

Otherwise, Feng Xia could probably begin to consider whether he should become an otherworldly Spider-Man.

“What a pity. Almost 50% of the attribute light balls were used to heal my injuries and expel the accumulated poison. About 10% to 20% were not absorbed in time and dissipated. Only the remaining ones had a strengthening effect.”

Feng Xia sighed to himself, but he did not really feel too sorry about it.

In any case, there was still an unknown number of black spiders around. He thought that he could definitely do this in installments. If he did not meet the standard, he would make up for it with the quantity. If he continued to persevere, he would be able to clear this dungeon sooner or later!

“Furthermore, it seems that after absorbing the Essence light balls, my hunger pangs have reduced. I guess it’s equivalent to solving the food problem?”

After doing some calculations, Feng Xia made up his mind and looked around. Before long, he locked his eyes on a large tree in the distance.

That was the tallest tree in the vicinity. Feng Xia decided to make his home in that tree for now. On the one hand, he would be able to better find a way out. On the other hand, he really needed a good rest.

Indeed, the “Essence” light balls could heal injuries and recover stamina…

However, he was still a standard otaku not so long ago. After going through such a fierce battle and killing so many disgusting spiders… he was mentally exhausted!

How do I get rid of my worries?

Through sleeping a lot!

I don’t suppose there are many creatures that can get up here … is there?

After absorbing a bunch of attribute light balls, Feng Xia had become stronger without becoming bald. He climbed to the top of the tree almost effortlessly and stood up straight, looking around and taking in his surroundings.

In all honesty, after encountering the black spiders, he was not very sure about his own assessment about the situation—yet he was simply too sleepy now.

After confirming that there was no danger for the time being, Feng Xia crawled into the crown of the tree and carefully covered himself completely. Finally, he fell asleep nervously.

“What bollocks. I’ve always stayed up late with trepidation. This is the first time I’ve gone to sleep with trepidation…”

In a daze, Feng Xia mumbled incoherently and gradually fell into a state of dreaming.

Suddenly, Feng Xia’s eyes snapped open.

Who am I?

Where am I?

What am I supposed to do?

The three classic philosophical questions appeared in his mind one after another. Only then did he remember that he seemed to be sleeping on a tree…

“But where in the world is this?”

“Could it be that I transmigrated again after sleeping!”

Feng Xia looked around in a daze. All he could see was ethereal pale clouds. They were vast and boundless, rising and falling around him. The everchanging clouds made it difficult for him to tell where he was.

At this moment, a disembodied voice, ancient and full of experience, sounded in Feng Xia’s ears.

“This is the depths of your dream realm.”

“Oh, so I’m dreaming.”

Feng Xia immediately understood and laid back down. “Then I’ll continue sleeping.”

“…”

After a short silence, the genderless voice sounded again. There seemed to be some fierceness in its words this time. “Kid, do you know what you’ve done? You were so close to ruining my grand plan!”

Boom!

That voice exploded like thunder and rumbled into the distance, sweeping up layers of clouds. It was as if a divine dragon was shuttling back and forth, creating a terrifying scene!

“Kid, do you know your crime?”

“Why are you shouting so loudly!”

Feng Xia could not sleep from all the noise, so he could only roll over and get up again. “Grand plan, grand plan, grand plan. Don’t you know that sleeping is the grandest plan? If you like to make a fuss, why aren’t you complaining to the property management team, the wuguan?”

“Wu Guan?”

The voice seemed stunned at first, but then it suddenly sounded angry. It seemed to laugh and cry at the same time. “Wu Guan! It’s you again! It has been 3,000 years! You still won’t let me off? You sent such a junior to ruin my plans?!”

Feng Xia thought about it and already had a guess about the situation he was in.

He nodded thoughtfully and smiled, saying, “If you have a tragic story, tell it to entertain everyone… oh no, I mean you can confide in me.”

…