Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich - Chapter 9

Chapter 9: The Demon King
Translator: StarveCleric Editor: StarveCleric

On the muddy sand field, a lonesome figure was running about.
Despite it being a running track made of cinders, the figure ran barefooted on it, enduring the pain of objects digging into the flesh while carrying a heavy armour weighing beyond a hundred kilograms on their back. This could no longer be regarded as a type of training but could only be considered a type of punishment.
Water has been sprinkled on the cinder road. The ashes may no longer rise up from the running about, but instead, it turned into a mud filled with ill will. The smooth foot from before was now full of wounds.
Every few hundred meters of running, the slim figure would fall down once. Even when the body was full of wounds and mud, the young lady will struggle up and head forward once again, then…
Fall down once again…
Fresh blood was flowing from both her feet, forming a bright red line on the cinder path.
To the young lady, the physical pain she was suffering was nothing. The thing that truly hurt to endure was the piercing glare from her peers.
All the passer-by couldn’t bear such a sight but no one walked forward to stop her.
This was because everything happened on the ground of Sulfur City’s Supreme Court. In the eyes of the population, it was the most sacred and impartial location. If someone was being punished here, they must have committed a crime deserving of it.
On the running track, two judges dressed in a court robe and wore silver-masks while discussing softly.
“Isn’t that Diana, the Captain of Town Security? Why is she running laps here with her legs bare and even carrying that heavy armour? It is like she is being punished.”
“Didn’t Lord Wumianzhe pass an order for the running track to be watered? Looks like it was prepared for her.”
“What did she do?”
“Didn’t the Town Security army overstep their authority a few days ago? They started a round-up exercise without proper authorization and Lord Wumianzhe seems to have caught on to it.”
“Acting without authorization? Isn’t that an extremely heavy crime? Even at the least, it would warrant exile… Oh, I get it!”
“Yeah, to sentence them all to exile seems too heavy, but going without punishment is impossible. Thus, when they came to submit the report these few days, Lord Wumianzhe refused to see her. Today, he was willing to meet her though, but he only casually said that he wanted to see the Town Security army doing freestyle running with heavy load, and this lady consciously went to carry it out.” 1
“…Going by standard procedure, if we leave it to the court to judge the case, they conducted violent acts without authorization, that warrants an exile at the minimum but this is obviously over the top. But if they go without punishment, then there could be someone who would follow in their footsteps and it would be hard to find a reason to punish them then.”
“Yeah, the best way of handling it is probably like that. First, give them the cold shoulder for a few days to let them know how grave the matter is. Then, make them ‘consciously’ get punished to warn the others. The law is dead, but we humans are alive. This way, not only did he manage to protect the dignity of the judiciary, he also managed to deal out a suitable punishment to those who did wrong. The balance struck between the two is worth studying. Lord Wumianzhe is really impressive.”
“…I think we better get back to work. I feel like Lord Wumianzhe is currently at the top of the tower looking down on us. If we leave him with an impression that we aren’t serious in our work, then we might get in trouble.”
The two of them left hurriedly. It was already time for work to start and as judges, they had their own cases to work on.
Dark Elves have very sensitive ears and the discussion between the two judges didn’t escape Diana’s ears. Thus, grinding her teeth, she stood up once again and shakily carried the hundred-kilogram armour to continue on with her punishment.
Not too far away at the top of a tower where Wumianzhe’s office was, the heartless Supreme Judge was carrying some binoculars to look down at the running track. It was different from what the judges guessed, he wasn’t overlooking the punishment but he watched the scenery with the mindset of appreciating the view.
“As expected, the wet shirt showcases the entire figure of the beautiful lady. The mud, in contrast, made the exercising copper body appear even more well-proportioned. Next time, I shall ignore the opposition of those fellows! I will add mud wrestling between beautiful ladies to the Sports Day program!!” 1
Putting down the binoculars, I seriously thought about the possibility of this being approved in the council.
What, punishment? Dignity of the judiciary? Are these toys important?
“Those stubborn old fools in the council may not approve of it, but I certainly will!!”
Appreciating the sight along with me was a middle-aged man who was smiling obscenely. He was blessed with good looks but he radiated a kind of tiredness from his soul.
Red light armour, fiery vermilion great sword, crimson hair reminiscent of the burning flames, his entire figure was like a wildly burning inferno. Despite being in the most peaceful city, he was equipped with his battle armour as usual and the broken silver sword on his waist may have been the only other colour on his entire body.
“The Phoenix of the East”, “The Deathless Man”, he had a bunch of nicknames along those lines but the one most people were familiar with was his identity as the “Red Lotus Sword Saint Hero”.
130 years ago, he brought his team of adventurers with him to assault Lord Yongye’s undead army and managed to decapitate the Undead Emperor, causing the entire undead army to fall apart. It was exactly as in those classic fairy tales where the hero kills the demon king and saves the world.
After that, he refused the gifts and recruitment offers from other countries and inconceivably, ventured to the abandoned underground world and built this unique city.
As the unique name of Sulfur Mountain City once again spread to the surface, the reputation of this hero soared once again.
“The Living Epic”, “The Perfect Hero”, this is how the humans on the surface called their hero nowadays.
But at this current moment, facing the wet top and seemingly visible sexy curves, on that honest square face was a face… of lewdness that all men shared.
“Why don’t we just conduct a mud marathon and make it mandatory for the Town Security Dark Elves and the bunch of Priestesses from the churches to join. The only attire allowed is underwear. Haha, we would make a fortune just by selling the entrance tickets.” (Roland)
The Red Lotus Sword Saint Adam Han was my direct superior, Sulfur Mountain’s City Lord. His greatest pleasure seemed to be creating trouble for his subordinates and the Public Council. My suggestion would definitely cause those old geezers to jump in rage, so there was no reason why he wouldn’t like it.
Don’t just look at how improper he seemed. In my system, this fellow was actually a LV262 SemiGod-rank existence. If placed on the surface, he would at the very least rival the king of a country.
“Hey, you old virgin, you have gotten stronger.”
When I saw him last week, he was only LV260. At such a high level, even progressing a single step was difficult. But he actually gained two levels in a week, this was really unbelievable.
“Yeah, old virgin, your eyes are still as sharp as ever. For a thing like the Fire Phoenix, the older he is, the stronger he gets. The me in my current state, my heart of the Phoenix is currently burning at its limits. I should be able to even beat the you at your peak period now.”
“Hehe, even if you are invincible now, aren’t you still an old chuuni virgin.”
“Yeah, just like the bones you are, an old virgin.”
The two old fellows who had been single for a few hundred years now, after having done their daily routine of pouring salt on each other’s wounds, both sighed together.
“When will my single life come to an end, I really want to get a girlfriend…”
“I am already numb to my lefty and righty. If it weren’t for you messing up the situation, I would have already gotten a woman by now and maybe, even a son… probably even a grandson.” 1
“Are you showing off? Do you think having a meat body is worth showing off? My lefty and righty are only bones now!” 3
“Showing off? Show off your head. Your rumors saying that I am destined to a lonely star caused all the beautiful ladies in the city to avoid me! Just last week, I ‘accidentally’ bumped into a hot chick and it should have been a wonderful encounter. But instead, she immediately ran towards the Holy Light Church to dispel the curse. To think of it as being a curse… Do you have any idea how I was feeling then?!?!”
“Of course I know, that is why I told that desert beauty that you were born under a lonely star!”
“I knew it! Why would an outsider know about these rumors otherwise, it was indeed you, bastard!!”
Alright, after that exchange, the Perfect Human Hero Adam and Sulfur Mountain City’s most dignified Supreme Judge Wumianzhe started fighting each other like kids.
But as usual, this meaningless fight came to an end very quickly.
This SemiGod warrior might be able to beat this trash whose fighting prowess is not even a 5, but I didn’t even feel pain so why would I be afraid of him. Different varieties of virgin sarcasm came rising up from my mouth.
“Serves you right for being single your whole life.”
“Legend has it that being a virgin for 30 years makes you a great wizard, you are already reaching 200 soon. It can’t be that you are already a great archsage. Come, let me see you shoot a fireball!”
“Why don’t I use magic to transform your lefty and righty into cute girls? I assure you they will be extremely cute. Oh oh oh, you wavered, you are actually wavering! Don’t be foolish, if magic could accomplish such a thing, why would I still be single now?”
Of course, while I was hurting him with my words, my heart was also bleeding.
“I am already 376 years old, but still single… I want to be resurrected!!”
When we finally remembered that there were still other matters to be dealt with today, it had already turned into evening. As expected, just like how a certain philosopher said, hurting each other would only leave a vacuum in its wake.
“Hey, you didn’t call me here today just to fight, did you?”
“Of course not, Margaret asked me to come here for an official task… now what was it again? Let me think about it for a moment!”
“Indeed, you are going senile already.”
“Stop being so noisy! I got it on the tip of my tongue! Oh oh, right, there are two matters today. No, actually it is only one.”
“Hm?”
“I am about to die, you know that right.”
Despite talking about his own death, that blockhead was saying it lightly as though he was talking about where to go to play tomorrow.
“Of course, in a minimum of a year and a maximum of 3 years, you are going to die!”
Of course, I would know. In the system notice of his personal data, there was a red box beside his name (Lifespan coming to an end), his death wasn’t too far away.
“157 years, I have already lived long enough and there aren’t any regrets as well.”
Really? No regrets? I guess he isn’t wrong in that regard. On the continent of Eich, a normal human’s lifespan was about 60 – 80 years and this fellow managed to last to near 200 solely on his frightening fighting prowess, so he could be considered to have had a long lifespan.
“Actually, there is no difficulty in expanding your life span…”
Of course, there wasn’t any difficulty to it. With his powerful fighting prowess, as long as he was willing to believe in Gods and get an identity as a worshipper, he could achieve longevity. Otherwise, if he didn’t want to work for other people, he could convert to some race with long lifespan, such as Angels, Demons, Undead and such. For him, it wasn’t a particularly difficult task.
But Adam simply laughed. His laughter was light, as though there were no regrets left in his life. Despite being relatively young, he acted just like a senior who had seen through the mysteries of the world.
“No, 150 years for a human with a short lifespan is way too long, I have already lived enough. A useless village youngster has already completed his dream and became a hero. Most of those I have been acquainted with are already dead. There is nothing left that I want to do, so it is about time for me to rest. Also, having an elderly person hogging on to the top position looks ugly too, it is about time for the newcomers to take the top spot.
“… You still miss Lisa.” His words couldn’t fool me.
Lisa Grant, Adam’s previous companion as well as his crush. However, hundred years ago, she died in battle against Lord Yongye.
With this fellow’s abilities, if he really wanted to get a girlfriend, there was no reason why he wouldn’t be able to find one. Furthermore, in his two attempts at marriage, if he had been determined to persevere until the very end, with his fighting ability, there is no reason why he would simply watch as we crashed his wedding.
“Hey, you really are a love saint. But, this is too selfish.”
“Yes, I am really selfish.” He actually lowered his head and admitted to it. “I am apologetic to Margaret. As an immortal, she is still young, she should choose a better partner.”
The Great Saint Margaret had had a crush on Adam for the longest time, but Adam simply couldn’t let go of his dead ex-girlfriend. This had already become an open secret among Sulfur Mountain City’s top brass.
As for the two attempts at marriage, he was probably intending to convince Margaret to give up on him. Of course, the fact that Margaret unhesitatingly contacted me to deliver the wedding present from her, showed that she was unwilling to give up on him. 2
Things like rumors could spread around very easily, yet at the same time, they could just as easily be stopped. The reason why it became an open secret, which everyone knew about, was most likely because the city lord Adam simply watched upon its development.
“What a foolish triangle relationship. Alright, as an outsider, I won’t pry into your affairs but since you have already decided to die, then the other matter, I roughly know what you are going to talk about.”
“Of course, since the jailer is about to die, then as the prisoner, it is about time we wrap up your sentence and prepare you for your release. Congratulations to you, Lord Yongye, how do you feel about regaining your freedom?” 1
Yes, this whole Sulfur Mountain City was actually a prison. Hero Adam, Great Saint Margaret and the Ancient Red Dragon Little Red, these three heads had been the jailers.
And I, previously known as Undead Emperor Lord Yongye, was the only prisoner of this jail! 1
“Then, Hero Adam, are you certain you want to release me, even though I nearly destroyed the world once already?”
“Anything that pleases you. A world without Lisa… if you want to destroy it, go ahead.” 5
CREATORS’ THOUGHTS
StarveCleric StarveCleric
Reedited by Devils_Advocate and his Team, the “Pranav Memorial Foundation”

(Before anyon missunderstands Pranav did not die, but because of Real Life, he was unable to continue as the Editor for Imperfectluck, the current translator, and he was the one who had wanted to reedit those chapters, before we continued his work of the first 7 chapters in 2019)