Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich - Chapter 8

Chapter 8: The Undead Playground
Translator: StarveCleric Editor: StarveCleric

What are the Undead? I’m afraid, in the eyes of most of the living, the first thought would be endless death.
In truth, there’s nothing wrong with that kind of saying. In the battlefield between the Order Gods and Chaos Gods, the Demon Lords created a spell that raised the dead. From that day onward, the Undead Calamity became the nightmare of the living.
But in truth, this cannot be blamed solely on the Undead themselves.
In this great continent, there are two reasons for the rise of the dead. The first is when someone dies with great injustice, regret or dreams and they are unwilling to disappear just like that. Then, there is an extremely small chance for them to come to life again.
This kind of natural-born Undead have an extremely low probability of occurring but they are often very powerful. After all, to defy the calling of death requires extraordinary willpower and resentment. It is said that the God of Death Ayer is the oldest natural-born Undead.
Undead who are born from such great resentment tend to become twisted. However, relying solely on their will to defy death to linger in the mortal world, they are often able to retain their self-awareness.
Of course, among them, the strongest and noblest are the incarnation of the will of heroes after dying. They are accepted by the Order Gods and granted a new immortal spiritual body along with a beautiful name – Heroic Spirits.
Other than the natural-born Undead, the other type of Undead would be the frequently seen in an Undead Calamity, the ones who were enslaved by the evil Necromancers to create even more deaths.
The magic for raising the dead originated from the Demons. To date, there are many different kinds of variations and developments of the spell.
At the very start, there were only corpses with low mobility. Afterwards, there came the swift Skeleton Warriors, Abominations made of flesh and blood stitched together, Skeleton Mages who were capable of wielding dark magic, Black Knights who were skilled in martial arts and finally, the strongest necromancer — Lich.
Following the development of Necromancy, the number of Undead tribes in present times are innumerable and those who are individually stronger than Liches don’t just number a few. Nevertheless, Liches, as natural-born masters of Necromancy, were still the core of the entire tribe for one special reason. Only the cunning Liches held the key to the evolution of the Undead, and their speciality was the research and creation of new Undead and Necromancy magic.
99.9% of the existing Undead are this kind of man-made Undead and only upon reaching silver-rank could they start to develop self-awareness. Even the strongest Undead heroes, upon waking up through Necromancy, were only monsters who recognized no kin. Their thirst for blood and souls would make them attack the ones they loved and once they savoured the taste of killing and consuming the delicious souls, it was hard for them to turn back.
The bloodthirsty Undead Calamity, such a saying isn’t wrong at all.
The Demons of the Chaos faction have a temperament to destroy themselves. They managed to coax the ancient Mountainous Clans to fall to depravity. However, they created their own mortal enemy, the Devils. They invented Necromancy, but then, they created a new race who was hostile towards them.
TL: Both Demons and Devils are of the Chaos Faction. The Mountainous Clan (originally the Order Faction) fell to depravity and became the Devils (of the Chaos Faction), and despite being of the same Faction, they are mortal enemies.
The Undead who regained their freedom had no qualms about revolting against their creators and even built their own nation. The current Necropolis Broly and the Country of Undead Xiluo have become the vanguards in the fight against Demons.
In the country consisting of the dead, Xiluo Empire, the authority was centered around the Council of the Night, which was made up of Liches, while the living only served as lowly slaves. Furthermore, there was an Undead Calamity a hundred years ago, the Yongye Catastrophe, which almost resulted in the end of the world, causing the undead to be viewed as an extreme danger by the Order faction.
Heroic Spirits, natural-born Undead, the intangible race, the high-rank Undead with self-awareness and the instinctively bloodthirsty low-rank Undead. Normal citizens don’t have the knowledge and ability to differentiate between them. Thus, in their eyes, the Undead District in the east is just a gathering of scary demons.
“That is to say, no matter what we say or do, it is all useless?”
“Of course, the living have their world of the living and the dead have their own world of the dead. Your Majesty, you might be able to ignore this kind of boundary, but to get normal citizens to cross it, it a long and arduous task.”
Ah Bas, who was lying on my head, said so. Although he was only a dog, at this moment, he seemed like a philosopher who had seen past life and death.
Not that far away, Ah Bao was currently hugging a pile of bones and he licked them, with a satisfied expression on his face.
Looking even further away was the sight of demons prancing around. But, in my eyes, it was a scene of a daily life that couldn’t be more normal.
The Undead don’t need sustenance but this didn’t mean that the high-rank Undead with self-awareness didn’t have any desires. Right here, in the biggest market of the East District, rows and rows of shops were currently in business.
“How much does this preservative cost? Add another insecticide in too, the ones without sulfur. My skin is sensitive to it.” This was a big sister Skeleton Mage; she’s currently troubled by the increasing bug population in her empty skull. 1
“Black bandages, cursed bandages, I guarantee you that your magic will be as stable as your intestines. Are there any mummy or zombie uncles that are interested? It is the newest model from The Ring of Mystical Magic, you can even choose between the mushroom picture and the bear picture.” 1
“All kinds of fresh blood for sale. Humans, Elves and Dwarves, we have all kinds of races stocked up here. Virgin(female), virgin(male), homosexual, we have different kinds of genders as well. If you purchase 2000CC at once, you can even enjoy a long-term home delivery service.”
The little girl who was wearing a red cap running around looked extremely cute, but the goods she was selling were equally scary.
“Skulls for sale, golden, jade, bronze, stone, dragon bones, whatever you need, we have it. Does anyone want to change their brain? Uncle Lich, do you want to change your brain? We even have a black ISO quality guarantee, we assure you that your magic will flow smoothly and that the material is tough and durable, no fake goods in the mix. There is a trial period for 3 days and you can refund it without any reasons.”
After waving my hand to chase away the annoying red-hat Blood Tribe girl, I focused my attention on the distant and saw the Skeleton Giant Klon, who was in charge of guarding the gates, waving to me. “Phew, those Town Security personnel are gone, I can finally go back now.” 1
The Undead District was unique in the entire Sulfur Mountain City. It was a comparatively independent district, where the Town Security had no authority to enforce the law.
I guess I had underestimated their will to capture me, to think they would actually block the gates. Looks like they were on a long-term ambush plan, waiting for me to walk into it so that they could catch me to calm their anger.
Caught off guard, their ambush almost succeeded but fortunately, Klon was there to block their advances.
To assault an Undead at the boundary of the Undead District, this kind of action could easily lead to a conflict. But as a good person, I proactively came up with a suggestion to solve the dispute.
“I heard that the Supreme Judge isn’t very satisfied with the Town Security army? No no, of course this isn’t a threat, I won’t send a complaint to the Hall of Enforcement, nor will I stand in front of the Supreme Court with banners and shout out my grievances. No, I am a good person, this definitely isn’t a threat. I just want you all to help out with an experiment for me. If you all agree, I would even be willing to leave with you. Hehe, it isn’t the first time I am bumping heads with you. Rest assured, this experiment isn’t some kind of evil magic. You should know, the main project of the year, the tourism-based Undead Theme Park is opening for service today and I am the contractor. But look, there isn’t a person in sight here to join in the fun. So, I am only inviting you all to become the first batch of customers and if you all have fun, you could help me advertise a bit as well.”
I rubbed my hands together, fawning on them.
“Of course, it is free, entirely free! As the first batch of customers, there is even a complimentary mystery gift!!”
“Breaking my promise? I am a believer of law and the God of Fairness, you are insulting my faith! There isn’t such a god? Well, there will be one in the future. Have faith in me, I will do what I promised you all. As long as you help me finish the tests on all of the entertainment programs, I will immediately leave with you.” 3
Thus, they agreed to my request…
Then, they regretted…
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Smelly bones! Let Momo down!! Momo’s entire body is aching!! Momo is dying!!!!”
…In front of me was a certain female knight who was dangling by a rope.
Then, silence, because… the rope snapped…
“…Ah Bas, next time write a sign on the bungee jumping station that one must strip their armour before bungee jumping.”
Looking at the big hole in front of me, I expressed my condolences.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhh! I knew that you wouldn’t be up to any good, you pile of bones!! Let me down!!”
Whooshing past me while shouting was vice-captain Yawen, which I met not too long ago. At this moment, her tanned face hardened, as though she would puke anytime now. Apparently, she wasn’t comfortable with the high-speed turns of the roller coaster.
“Let me down, you devils! Accept the judgement of the Holy Light!”
“Noooo, you absolutely cannot do that!! Don’t summon the Holy Light on the roller coaster! …Forget it, looks like I was too slow. Ah Bas, remember to write a sign saying ‘Don’t summon the Holy Light on any one of the playground’s facilities’ and place it at the entrance.”
My warning came too late. No matter what, the materials for building these attractions were still the products of Necromancy and if it were to meet its fated enemy, the Holy Light…
The sight of the car dissipating when the roller coaster was on a slope hundred meters high and dashing down with high-speed, I finally had the honour to see it today…
“Wow, she flew really far…” 1
I swear that I didn’t do it on purpose…
“Owehh! You bastard!”
The beautiful Elven ladies were sitting in a circle puking their guts out without caring about their image, this sight…
“Ah Bas, lower the Hell Turning Cup’s speed by 300%.”
Looks like I forgot that the living would get giddy when turning too fast. Yup, yup, it was best to lower the turning speed. 1
“My brain!!! I can’t see anything, you are going down today!!”
“The Universe Flying Saucer should just stick to a 180-degree turn, we should forget about doing a 360 degree.”
Looks like I also forgot that when a living person’s head was hanging upside down for too long, they would experience temporary loss of vision and even death if hanged even longer.
“Too high, I’m scared, even the heavens and earths are shaking! Let me down, I’m begging you.”
“The Ferris Wheel only needs to slowly move up and down, the carriage doesn’t have to spin.”
“Retreat, you evil beings!! Holy Light, I face so many evil spirits in front of me, is this the end?”
“I guess we shouldn’t use real spirits in the haunted house? But that wouldn’t be scary enough. But if we use real spirits, then what if those warriors really go all out against them. Hey, I should just close it for now.”
“Stop, I’m begging you! My head is spinning… no! Ah!”
“Pah!” The resounding resonance of someone crashing into the wall made one’s head hurt just by listening.
“The Spirit Horses can pass through walls, but the living…” 2
“Luckily I did a test with them! It is wonderful that no life has been lost. Even the Holy Knights known for their great endurance are suffering so much, if it was the normal population…”
Looking at the tragedy in front of me, hearing their sharp shrieks and yells of agony, I couldn’t help but feel fear. I tried to copy the idea of an amusement park from another world but it seems like it didn’t go well with this world. If it weren’t for these ‘kind people’ helping me with my experiments just now, it would have probably caused a disaster.
To thank them, I decided to fulfil my own promise and even wanted to follow them back to the Town Security base after the test, but…
“Today you have all worked very hard. There are still another 120 segments to go. After finishing the testing, let’s all go report to the Town Security army together, I definitely won’t run away.”
“You… You better remember this. You might have won today but one of these days, I will take you into custody!”
But they all ran away…
“Don’t forget your complimentary mystery gift. It is a free year ticket for the Undead Theme Park. Remember to come by the next time!” 2
CREATORS’ THOUGHTS
StarveCleric StarveCleric
Hello dear readers, Devils_Advocate here.

For those of you, who have either just started with this novel, or have come back to start it another time here is a little disclaimer. This novel is currently being translated by its 3rd translator. And the quality of the first two could be described as … improvable ^^ .

So me and a couple of others have decided to make all chapters up until 172, when the current translator took over, a little bit more readable and we have started editing them. Please feel free to point out any missgivings this new version may have on the discord;

https://discord.gg/hRDyYwQ