Everybody is Kung Fu Fighting, While I Started a Farm - Chapter 84
Chapter 84: Killer Star Falls Apart
Baa~~
Goat bleats could be heard from the distance. With a whole flock of cows and goats in the breeder’s union being mauled to death, even the surviving livestock were deeply traumatized, each of them shaking and crying out.
Meanwhile, the eyes that were exposed beneath Killer Star’s mask were bulging roundly as he watched what was unfolding before him.
‘What is going on?
‘What the hell?’
He thought that he had gone blind, witnessing a sports car transforming and children jumping out of bottle gourds.
“Illusion?”
“Or… a special superpower?”
He finally used his abdomen to stir True Qi as a way of talking. When he started to mutter quietly to himself, however, one could hear the hoarseness in his voice.
Then, after a few mumblings, his voice suddenly became much louder and the True Qi over his body stirred. He stared at Jiang He, sneering, “It seems that you’ve awakened a superpower that conjures mental illusions, and its rank is not so low that it actually affects me!”
“It’s fake, all of it!”
The golden markings over his palms shone again as he slapped his palm at Jiang He from some distance away, unleashing a golden palm of True Qi that tore through the night toward him.
“Gramps, make way! Allow me!”
In response, the eldest Bottle Gourd Brother in the red dudou went to stand in front of Jiang He, his body rapidly expanding until he became a giant standing four-meters tall. Weirdly, however, his dudou did not split, and it enlarged alongside the brother.
His muscles tightened and poked out, and he swung his fist that was the size of an electric rice cooker to punch the golden palm of True Qi into pieces, before sucking on his thick, large thumb and flashing a silly grin, “Am I awesome, gramps?”
“….”
Jiang He forced a smile, “Awesome. My grandkids are the most awesome!”
On the other hand, the look on Killer Star’s face changed dramatically.
“Impossible!
“I’ll never believe it!”
Driving his True Qi to its limit, black mist rolled off around his body and he lunged toward Jiang He.
That was when the third brother stepped up, shouting, “Watch me, gramps!”
His small body shone with golden radiance as he blocked Killer Star’s palm head-on. Even if he was forced over eight steps back, he was absolutely fine.
After all, the third brother had a body of steel and was invincible against all weapons.
Nearby, the second brother was pulling back.
Being all-seeing, all-hearing and a strategist, he did not join the fight and took the role of commander instead, shouting, “Fourth Brother, fire!”
Fourth Brother hence went up front, opened his mouth and breathed.
Whoosh!
A streak of flames was let loose.
“What the heck…”
Jiang He took several steps back by reflex. The flame was so hot that it would not be surprising if it melted steel.
Fifth Brother, not one to be outdone, breathed a jet of water.
Jiang He’s mouth hung open and he muttered, “Not even high-pressure washer guns could do that…”
“Aaaaaah!!!
Meanwhile, Killer Star was howling. Just as he charged True Qi a moment ago to extinguish the flames, the jet of water struck his chest. Feeling as if he was struck by a giant hammer, his entire body was sent flying backward.
At the same time, his gaze was rather blank.
What was going on?
Was that not supposed to fake? Was that not an illusion?
Then, even as his body hung in the air, he suddenly felt a chill behind him, and he let out a gasp of surprise, clutching his buttocks…
A fiery agony had made his eyes go red.
When he landed, Killer Star screamed hysterically, “Who is it? Who blindsided me?”
He was still clutching his buttocks even as he spoke.
“Hehe!”
That was when a giggle could be heard.
In the darkness, a small boy wearing a blue dudou materialized, and he was still holding his fingers in the pose of One Thousand Years of Death[1].
It was Sixth Brother, whose ability was invisibility.
Jiang He’s mouth twitched and he barked, “Sixth Brother! A fight is a fight—don’t play around! And couldn’t you have learnt something else? Who taught you that anyway?”
Killer Star felt as if he was going crazy. Right now, he had no intention to fight, let alone kill Jiang He.
However, just as he turned to leave, Jiang He yelled, “Stop him!”
Thud-thud-thud!
The awesomely-designed bright-red Transformer hence strode toward Killer Star, block its way.
There was a wheel on each of its limbs, and right now, the wheel over its right arm was splitting and reassembling into a bright-red laser sword over two meters long, whereas its entire left arm had turned into a six-barreled rotary cannon.
Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat!!!
The rotary cannon unleashed a volley, firing streaks of orange-red bullets at Killer Star in the night.
It was exceedingly powerful.
Moreover, its greatest strength was its extreme bullet velocity and focused accuracy, unleashing 3,000 shots per minute. Even if ordinary bullets would not hurt a rank-eight martial artist, Killer Star was left deflated under its sheer firepower and pushed back on every turn, the True Qi protecting his body kicking sparks as it got hit.
Woah!
Jiang He was captivated by the Transformer’s move.
It was also the first time he saw the laser sword and the six-barreled rotary cannon.
Meanwhile, with the Killer Star pinned down, all seven Bottle Gourd Brothers attacked at once alongside the Transformer, beating the Grand until he was left ashen-faced and all his hair burnt off!
“Jiang He!”
Killer Star bellowed, and failed even as he attempted to escape again.
Although, the little brats that popped out of the bottle gourds were at best rank-seven intermediate and not that strong. However, their combined attack was flawless, and whenever you attack one of them, the other six would swarm over you.
As for that… robot warrior—a name that Killer Star thought up just then, since he had never seen one before…
“What in the world is that thing?”
“Isn’t it too tough?”
Killer Star had tried to slip past the Transformer’s side since its movements were clumsy.
Even so, that never worked. Even though Killer Star’s stone breaking palm could split even mountain boulders, he only made a clanging sound when he struck the Transformer.
Still, Killer Star had noticed a certain clue.
It appeared… that it was controlled by Jiang He’s voice.
For example, if Jiang He ordered, ‘stop him’, all the robot warrior did was stop Killer Star.
Then, if Jiang He said ‘hit him’, the robot warrior would join in the fray.
Therefore…
As a ferocious glare shot out of Sky Killer’s eyes, while he took the full brunt of Eldest Brother’s rice-cooker sized punch in his stride, he bounded toward Jiang He even as he vomited blood.
He was going to free as long as he killed Jiang He!
Boom!
Demonic Qi burst in full power around him as he pushed his Sky Demon Arcanum to the limit, his palm turning into talons as he clawed at Jiang He from the distance.
The look on Jiang He’s face changed then.
He had been standing at a corner, popping qi pellets and eating carrots while enjoying the show. Now, he promptly charged Indestructible Diamond, extended his hand to draw his Dragon-Slaying Saber and cut toward the palm of Demonic Qi.
Boom-crack!
His ten-meter thunder-slash exploded.
With three consecutive slashes, Jiang He tore the palm of Demonic Qi apart and yelled, “Kids, surround him… eh?”
As he looked on, the seven Bottle Gourd Brothers all turned into seven clouds of smoke with several loud bangs, and all of them flew back into their respective bottle gourds.
“Damn it!”
“Out of charge!”
Jiang He face dropped, and he could not help complaining, “How many days have I charged them under the sun? Aren’t these brothers a little too weak, lasting just a dozen minutes in battle?”
Meanwhile, Killer Star stopped in his tracks halfway through his charge, and began to laugh out loud in arrogance.
He felt his whole body relaxing as the pressure of being surrounded and beaten vanished entirely, and he smugly said, “Do you have any more tricks to pull, Jiang He?”
He strode toward Jiang He and spoke sinisterly. “Tell me, how do you want to die?”
Snikt!
A luminous sword shot out between Jiang He’s brow then, punching through Killer Star’s chest.
At the same time, Jiang He grinned calmly, saying, “What I say, goes. I told you I’d burn joss paper at your grave next year, I’m doing it!”
Oom.
The luminous sword returned to him, slicing its way through Killer Star’s back as it came.
Hence, the smug look on Killer Star’s face stiffened. He lowered his head to look at his own chest, mumbling, “Royal Sword!”
Fresh blood poured freely out of his mouth.
He could actually see that his own heart had been sliced apart by the sword with the dim glow of distant streetlights. Life was rapidly leaving his body as his gaze became muddled, before he fell on his back rigidly.
[1] One Thousand Years of Death/Pain: a technique in Naruto where the user stabs their fingers between the target’s buttocks.
